Sex Basics

First of all – Sex and Love are not the same thing!

Love is a tough word to define – you can love ice cream, love to dance, love Maths, and even love your pet. Loving someone means different things to different people but it comes back to some of the basics including mutual respect, trust and understanding. It is an emotion, while sex, on the other hand, is a biological event.

If someone tries to tell you that having sex will help love to grow, they are mistaken. Often times, when you are young, it can cause many problems. It can be misleading – the physical sensations can make you believe that there is more in common than there really is. Love is based on respect, trust and mutual understanding, so the sacrifice made by sex just serves to complicate things and take attention away from other important areas of a relationship. Lines like “If you care about me, you’ll have sex with me” or “You owe me” should be warnings. You don’t have to have sex with someone to prove you like them or pay them back for gifts or evenings out. It is not a trade-off.

Abstinence, not having sex, has some great advantages. Not only don’t you have to work about getting sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), you also don’t have to deal with a pregnancy, or a thousand other problems that casual sex brings. No other method is 100% safe.

Sex for young people is risky. Remember to think about your own personal values and feelings. Address the issues of sex once you have established yourself as a couple for the long term, as in marriage.